Women's Health

11 tricks to enhance your possibilities of success

We all have behaviors or character traits that we would like to change. Perhaps you're a couch potato wishing you'd enjoyed a workout, or a driving force with mountains of debt. But even if Mother Nature did not give you the innate qualities you want, you can cultivate them yourself.

Learn how to better control your thoughts and behaviors.

"Research shows that humans are a product of both their genetics and the environment," says Carla Marie Manly, Ph.D., a California-based clinical psychologist and author of Joy From Fear (Familius, February 2019). "We are born with certain genetic factors, but as we grow and move through life we ​​can develop into the type of person we want to be."

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While you cannot change your genetic coding, you can learn to better control your thoughts and behaviors. Our experts offer these 11 tips to drive change and increase your chances of success.

Clarify your goal

To say "I want to be a better person" is too vague. A clearer goal, according to Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist and relationship expert at Tone Networks, is to "be kinder to others." To do this, you can practice being a better listener, showing empathy for someone in need, or being more patient while driving.

Thank you for watching!Visit the websiteThank you for watching!Visit the websiteA person who records their food intake has a better chance of being specific and noticing eating habits.

A person who records their food intake has a better chance of being specific and noticing eating habits.

Keep a real-time log

Trying to remember a behavior at a later date often leads to an overestimation or underestimation of what really happened, says Manly. For example, a dieter who records her food intake has a better chance of being specific and noticing eating habits.

Be proactive, not reactive

Sometimes it is easier to change situations than to change your reaction. For example, if you get irritable with friends late in the week, spend time with them on the weekend when you're rested and see if it makes a difference.

Manage expectations

It's not realistic to say, "I'm going to stop swearing now," but it is realistic to stop swearing at work in order to start.

Start slowly

If you hurry up and don't get it right, you might feel guilty or defeated, says Durvasula. For example, if you want to eat more vegetables, add one serving per day to your existing plan instead of forcing yourself to eat vegetables at every meal.

Add frequency

As your new behavior becomes a habit, increase the frequency with which you practice it, for example several times a day or a week.

Rewrite your self-talk

Manly suggests consciously shifting a negative inner dialogue into a positive one in order to better achieve your goals. For example, if your inner voice says, "I am not worthy", change that to "I am more than enough".

Sweet memories

Place simple, supportive messages around you to remind you of your goal. If you're trying to exercise more, write on your bathroom mirror, “Take a 10-minute walk after work! You will feel so much better! "Manly recommends.

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Identify those in your inner circle who support you. Distance yourself from negative people.

Ask for assistance

Your inner circle can contribute positively or negatively to your change, says Durvasula. Identify who is supporting you so you can get positive feedback and encouragement, and distance yourself from negative people so they don't derail you.

Be nice to yourself

See stumbling and missteps as opportunities, not mistakes. "Mistakes are the way we learn and can even be viewed as triumphs," says Durvasula. "If you see a lesson rather than a mistake, you are less likely to punish yourself for it."

Reward yourself

Recognize your progress with a reward based on your individual desires. "For example, a warm evening bath could be a real luxury for a busy mom," says Manly.

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